Differentiating A Shopaholic From A Shopper
shopaholic – a compulsive shopper; “shopaholics can never resist a bargain”
Recently I was having one of those casual throw-away types of conversations with someone while waiting for somebody else. She’d been shopping for the afternoon, and began saying how she’d been trying to kerb her shopping habits of late, as kept finding herself buying things for the sake of it rather than through genuine need or liking. She described how she goes into a daze during the process.
Then she asked am I addicted? And it got me thinking about the way we laugh off things like a shopping addiction, after all it’s just shopping – right?
What Is Addiction
We’re probably less inclined to see a shopping addiction or associate the label shopaholic in the same tone as we might a drug addiction / addict with it’s anti-social implications, or over-eating, smoking, drinking, gambling and a range of others.
Those behaviours are more obvious sometimes dramatic in how they impact the economy both socially and economically, as well as the affects they may have on the lives of an individual and their nearest and dearest. But where something as innocent as a little retail therapy is concerned, we barely turn a hair.
Isn’t It Normal?
After all shopping is a widely accepted practice carried out by everyone to a greater or lesser degree, whether it’s done alone, with friends or in family groups? Isn’t it a key activity that most people enjoy, enabling us to buy the essentials, kill time at the weekend and offer a good excuse to check out the latest fads and fashions in food, clothing, gadgetry, home entertainment, and sometimes indulge in a some pure luxury.
Carol Look an EFT master, trainer and psychologist talked about this topic during the 2010 World Tapping Summit and defined an addiction thus:
“A habit only becomes classified as an addiction when we want to stop a behaviour and find that we can’t”.
And she went on to talk about the chemical changes that happen with addictive behaviour and how it starts much earlier in the day than when the behaviour actually plants the seed.
So if this is happening to you, it’s likened to the notion that you deserve a treat and the mind probably plays quite a few rounds on why you deserve it and various other ramblings that the subconscious uses to justify itself.
The bottom line is, you are programming it from a certain moment in time and it keeps building, in anticipation, until you finally carry out the deed and then – wham – it’s done and a completely different set of ramblings kick-in.
Next to arrive on the scene are the negative feelings of guilt, pain, anguish or stress.
Other signs to look for are:
- Mounting debt
- Items not opened or used
- A sense of overwhelm
- An inability to stop
- Having to shop-til-you-drop
No matter how many times you replay the programme, you may come to realise that it does not fulfill the need, maybe it hides low self-esteem, or the need for some excitement and change of routine, resulting from boredom.
Have you got your shopping under wraps, or are there other issues going on?
Out Of Control Shopping Addiction
If your shopping addiction has spiraled out-of-control then it’s fair to say it may just be a problem of an addictive nature, but the good news is that it can be stemmed, because it has been caused by something at some time that led you to the behaviour to avoid the pain of what was going on.
And this applies to any addiction. It’s all workable, and it helps to know that when it comes to making the change and it’s reversible.
Do You Want To Change Yours?
If you have a habit, compulsion or addiction that you’d like to address, contact me for a chat at the details below, let’s see what’s going on so you can have it be different.
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Working with Jane
Changing unwanted patterns with all-things-food makes an enormous difference to everything else, especially how you feel about yourself.
When it comes to making better decisions, addressing what stops you is a very good place to start. Are you ready to take the plunge?